I’m sure we all find ourselves doing this at times. Someone we know doesn’t understand LGBT and we try to enlighten them. For some people that are really open this is a joy. Unfortunately, that seems to be the exception. More often it is like what I went through the past few days.
I had a religious relative who chose to pick a FB fight over an LGBT meme with me. We went back and forth. I wanted so very much to help her learn. I kept trying to use comparisons from my Christian days that I knew she could relate to. But even those didn’t help.
As the argument went on and on it seemed she kept missing my points. Finally, I asked if she would be willing to consider changing her view if I could present sufficient evidence. The answer was a very harsh NO. It was then that I realized it wasn’t that she didn’t know, it was that she didn’t want to know.
Years ago she had been taught LGBT is bad in some Biblestudy and that was that. At that point, she decided to turn her brain off to all future information on the topic.
Self-imposed ignores is such a sad thing.
At this point, it was clear there was no point in continuing the argument. She would never change. I don’t know what hurt more the realization that she hates who I am, or that she is actively choosing to be ignorant.
I know I had my deeply religious days too. Back then the old “The Bible says it, I believe it, that settles it” motto was mine. But even back then if someone said they had compelling evidence that I was miss reading the Bible I would listen. I would scrutinize every word they said but I would consider it.
Yet here I was with a relative that just flat didn’t want to learn, period. I think the really ironic thing is, while I am sure she feel ‘solid in her conviction and belief in God’, what this really says is that she doesn’t have that much faith. People with faith also have courage. They are willing to step out because they have real confidence in what they believe.
But she didn’t she had to retreat to her chosen belief, shut all of the doors and lock them tight. She will never learn. She will never grow as long as she keeps the door shut.
So, on the one hand, I feel I have lost because I will never have the opportunity to show her the truth. On the other hand she is by far the greater loser in all that she will never learn.